


i've shed my skin too many times to count

by vertigo



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic, His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Character Study, Daemons, F/M, M/M, Murder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 14:09:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30039894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vertigo/pseuds/vertigo
Summary: When Ichirou Moriyama was born, his mother knew he was something special.
Relationships: Stuart Hatford/Ichirou Moriyama
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15





	i've shed my skin too many times to count

**Author's Note:**

  * For [darkbluebox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkbluebox/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The Sphynx and the Hare](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21726496) by [darkbluebox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkbluebox/pseuds/darkbluebox). 



> this is another attempt to honor and love [The Sphynx and the Hare](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21726496/chapters/51827602), thank you blue for writing it, this was supposed to be your birthday gift but well uh... happy faygo day. I hope you enjoy it!

When Ichirou Moriyama was born, his mother knew he was something special. Her daemon beamed with pride, his teeth shining as the baby cried "Ichirou." Inoue said, at the same time Hikaru purred "Mizuki."

Kengo stood proud by their side, his daemon's eyes shining in the delivery room. That was the kid he waited for months to be born, but there was a dissatisfying shadow crossing his face as for the first time, Ichirou's daemon shifted from a black cat to a tiny moth.

Ichirou was a quiet baby, a spoiled prince that wouldn't leave his mother's arms as the _poofing_ of his daemon shift continued. Hikaru would always be found carefully carrying Mizuki from one room to another, the baby daemon tucked neatly between his teeth.

While Ichirou was a quiet baby, economical in his moves and cries, Mizuki was the life of the house. She possessed a delightful laughter that would erupt during the night and keep the occupants awake. Her voice changing with each shift.

***

When Ichirou was five, he saw his mother's stomach grow big. He would stroke the skin, talk to the baby growing inside her.

Hikaru was silent. Inoue was silent.

Mizuki would laugh and laugh, then stop when Ichirou cast her a serious look. She would poof, going from a tabby kitten to a barn owl.

Despite the difference in their behaviors, Ichirou and Mizuki, as most pairs of daemon and humans, were glued to the hip. They would sit for hours in front of the TV, watching National Geographic Channel-- Ichirou's idea was that the television would help, they could cycle through all the animals until Ichirou decided what form she would take.

Mizuki huffed and puffed, the red feathers of a cardinal falling to the floor. "But I know what I want to be!" She said. Then sang a dark melody.

"Come here," Ichirou said, cupping his palms so Mizuki would fly there, halfway she shifted into a canary. "It's not about what you want to be. It's what _we_ need to be, understood?"

She puffed again. Then poofed into a spider. "You're far too obsessed with your image, we shouldn't let the others decide what we are." They lapsed into silence after that, changing the channel from Nat Geo to BBC and letting the narrator drown on about the rainforest animals. Ichirou poked Mizuki, making her shift into a salamander. Then poked her again and she changed into a snake.

"You're right," Ichirou agreed after a few minutes, kissing the cool and slimy top of Mizuki's head. "ew."

Mizuki cackled, then shifted into a tiny butterfly to whisper on Ichirou's ear, "Want to teach them a lesson? We can…" her voice was a soft whisper, so low that even Ichirou had to strain his ears to listen to her plans. "What do you think, Ichi?"

Ichirou hummed, then cupped his palms again with a smile. "Yes!" Mizuki poofed once more, falling on Ichirou's hand with a wet sound. Ichirou grinned at his black and blue frog daemon, watching her croak with delight.

He set out through the house, the pitter patter of his footsteps was the only warning the guests in his father's office got before he barreled in. Ichirou stopped, making a slow sweep of the men gathered around his parents and then bowing profoundly when his father stared at him. "Father."

"Ichirou," Kengo said, a bright smile in his mouth. Keiko, Kengo's crane daemon, clicked her beak, then looked at Ichirou and Mizuki as if she knew they were on to something. Ichirou rocked on his heels, proudly showing Mizuki to Keiko.

"Mizuki," Keiko said, a note of amusement in her royal voice. "Come see this, Hikaru." Ichirou didn't move, watching as his mother's daemon slinked away from the shadows where he was to take a peek at Mizuki.

Hikaru's tail flicked once, twice, then turned back in his heels as if Mizuki's shift was nothing. Ichirou craned his neck, watching his mother shake her head as Hikaru laid on top of her belly. Keiko casted the pair a worried look, then nodded at Ichirou, not before her voice sounded again. "Would you take a look at that?" She told the room at large, and suddenly Ichirou was crowded by men and daemons alike.

They all criticized him, almost six and his daemon didn't take a permanent shape. That was Inoue's fault. A future Lord should have a better hold of his own daemon. The most vocal of them was Daigo-San, his mink shaped daemon shaking her head viciously.

The only one who didn't say a word was the Butcher, his skinny dog daemon staring at Ichirou and his outstretched hand as if he was the most interesting person on the planet. Ichirou smiled at him, his best gap toothed white teeth smile before he turned to Daigo-San's daemon. "Lick it!"

"What?" The mink asked as the other daemons stared at Ichirou.

"I dare you! I double dare you!" Ichirou said, getting on his knees and stretching as far as he could go so his croaking daemon was right in front of the mink's muzzle. "Lick it! Lick it! Lick it!" He watched as the daemon turned her head around and Daigo-san nodded.

The touch of the tongue across his demon's back sent a satisfying twitch down Ichirou's back, Mizuki and him closed their eyes with delight and only opened them again when the mink took a step back.

It didn't take long before she and her human started to gag and choke.

The room went silent as they died.

Only the Butcher laughed. "That was well done, little Lord." Nathan Wesninski said, approaching Ichirou with a glowing smile. "The daemon should be a useful extension of yourself." He patted Ichirou's head proudly while his daemon butted Ichirou's hand and he scratched her head.

His father also looked proud for the first time as his daemon shifted to a black beetle. "Thank you Mr. Wesninski! Father, can I play outside?"

Kengo nodded and smiled, flicking his hand in a careless gesture. "Of course my son, thank you for your help."

***

Ichirou was six when his mother died.

 _Car accident_ , his father said.

Ichirou knew better. It was no accident. Mizuki overheard his father saying Riko was never to be part of the family. Tetsuji was to collect him as soon as possible.

Mizuki spent a silent week as an owl, hooting at night and breaking the sepulchral silence of the Moriyama household.

***

Ichirou never liked Tetsuji.

His words held no truth and he was far too close to the family. It was unfair that Riko was shuttered away from them while Tetsuji waltzed as if he owned the house.

His demon's favorite pastime was to shift into a coyote every time Tetsuji walked into the house. Mizuki would stay hidden in the shadows, just waiting for the pathetic raven to appear before she pounced her.

Ichirou would take a particular delight in the way Tetsuji fell to the floor time and time again and writhed in pain as Mizuki stepped on the raven's neck and snapped her jaws. "What are you doing here, uncle? You know you're not part of the family." Ichirou asked as Mizuki growled.

"I came to...ask… your father… for a favor." Tetsuji gasped and Ichirou snapped his fingers so Mizuki would step away from the raven.

Mizuki shifted into an eagle, then a dove. "You ask for far too many favors." She said, then nuzzled Ichirou's ear, cooing and bobbing her head in the direction of the Butcher.

"Mr. Wesninski. It's a pleasure to see you here." Ichirou said, then waved at Furia who carelessly stepped over the fallen raven.

"You're shaping to be just what a Lord needs to be, Ichirou." Nathan said, giving Ichirou a deep bow. "Next time give it a good bite. The wing maybe?"

Ichirou hummed, then smiled at Nathan before bowing. "Thank you, Mr. Wesninski. I will think about it." He turned to Tetsuji, who was keeping his daemon close, perched on his shoulder like a statue. There's some satisfaction in seeing her feathers ruffled. Ichirou just wished they were a little more… Bloodied. "Move along, if you're here it's because father is waiting for you."

***

Ichirou was fifteen when he met the Hatfords.

He knew the name. Mrs. Wesninski's family. Mary was highly debated in the last twelve months. Ichirou heard bits of it, coming from an angry Tetsuji and a calm Nathan.

The Hatford were a short bunch, spearheaded by the family's father Christopher Hatford, a graying man with deep green eyes who walked in flanked by his two sons. James Hatford was an unremarkable man, green eyes and sleek face.

Stuart Hatford however, was extremely remarkable. There was an underlying hint of violence in the shadows of his grey eyes.

Ichirou looked towards Mizuki, shifting from a spider to a stoat and draping herself across Ichirou's shoulders as she watched the group with interest. No one in his household batted an eye, far too accustomed to the poof and shift of Mizuki. Christopher and James didn't care.

But Stuart cocked his head in Ichirou's direction once his badger daemon nipped his ankle. "Your daemon hasn't settled yet?" He had a deep voice that made Ichirou, for the first time in his whole life, feel small and stupid for forcing Mizuki to cycle between animals.

Ichirou stared at him for a long time while Mizuki smiled, wriggling her tail and changing into a finch. She hopped from Ichirou's shoulders to the floor, staring at the badger for too long minutes. It seems like the whole room is watching them.

Stuart stood still, his hand in his pockets as his badger seemed to be silently judging Mizuki.

Ichirou replied with an insolent look and his arms crossed around his chest.

Mizuki poofed once more, a hyena this time.

And she laughed before turning on her heels and dragging her spotted fur against Ichirou's shins. "No, she hasn't. Problem?"

Before Stuart could answer that question, his father chastised him and he turned on his heels on their way to the Moriyama dining room.

Ichirou followed them from a safe distance, watching as Mizuki wriggled her tail, then shifted into a bee to buzz her way to Ichirou's shoulder and shifted again into a marten as she closed her eyes. "What was that, Mizuki?" Ichirou asked, lifting one hand to scratch her soft fur as they took their place by his father's side.

"Nothing. It was interesting." Mizuki said with a yawn.

Ichirou watched as the Hatfords tried to bargain for Mary's and her son's life. His father was irreducible-- Mary Wesninski was a Wesninski problem and there was nothing they could offer that would change Kengo's mind.

Ichirou thought that was a waste of time.

Mizuki slinked from his shoulders down to the floor, beneath the table where Ichirou couldn't see her, only feel the occasional pressure in his gut as she changed.

The Hatfords were growing desperate and Ichirou bored. That was a good alliance and his father was passing it up just because of the Butcher. Ichirou yawns behind his hand, Mizuki's shifts have been taking a toll on him, but he still doesn't want to let her settle. Nothing feels right under his skin.

He's so entertained he almost missed the quiet hush beneath the table, Mizuki's voice comes in a secretive laugh. "Come back for us in a few years," she asked and Ichirou had to hold back the laugh when he felt something running up and down his arm. Stuart moved his eyes from Kengo's face to Ichirou's serene stare.

Ichirou tipped his head to the side, then focused back on their crumbling negotiations.

***

Mizuki's shifts were getting less frequent, to the point where she would spend weeks settled and then Ichirou would awake to a different animal laying by his side.

Her shifts would take a severe toll on Ichirou, he would be constantly tired on change days and Ichirou wouldn't move much, focusing all the energy on work and taking his tea break with his father.

"I'm worried about you," Keiko said one day, staring Mizuki down as Ichirou and Kengo shared a tea. His father's crumbling health was a glaring issue that everyone in the household talked about. "You're twenty five and you haven't settled. That's…"

Mizuki was a crane this time, a mirror image of Keiko as she hopped silently through the room.

Ichirou watched as Mizuki ran her beak over Keiko's elegant neck.

The next thing he knew, he was almost curled on himself as Mizuki shifted into a boa, wrapping herself around Keiko and squeezing her bird bones.

Kengo gasped and Ichirou took his time to recompose himself and pick his tea with a trembling hand. "I thought I made it clear that Mizuki had all the freedom she wanted to shift." Ichirou said calmly.

Keiko squawked, a beautiful agonizing sound before Mizuki set her free so she could hobble to Kengo's side. "Ichirou," his father coughed as Mizuki slithered her way to lay her heavy head on Ichirou's lap.

"Father." Ichirou replied, finishing his tea and running his hand over Mizuki's head. "Do not worry father, I have everything under control.

***

Ichirou wasn't surprised the first time his father collapsed.

Mizuki was still a boa, lounging in the warmth of the sun as he took care of his flowers.

He patted her head and smiled softly, clapping his hand to get rid of the dirt, then motioned her to follow him to his new office.

***

Ichirou wasn't surprised the second time he collapsed.

He was far more interested in watching the planes moving on his screen. The flight from England was arriving just in time.

***

Ichirou wasn't surprised when the Butcher died.

The plane got to America in time, after all.

***

Ichirou watched with interest as his father's breath got shorter. Death was such a beautiful thing he couldn't look away from it.

His father was rotting on a hospital bed, with no one but him to watch. "Ichirou…" his father said, and Ichirou moved his chair closer, kissing his knuckles reverently. It took him time to get here. Poisoning should be done slowly and surely until it completely ruins the person.

"Yes father?"

"I…" Kengo tried to speak, but a cough rattled his lungs.

Mizuki smiled, a cute black kitten curled near his father's hip. Ichirou nodded at her, watching her climb into Kengo's chest and kneading the sulled skin gently. Ichirou holds his father's hand in his, keeping him company as he fights for his life. "Don't worry father, I am ready."

Ichirou smiled sweetly, then looked at Mizuki as she changed. It felt like being sucker punched on the chest, but Ichirou powered through the pain as his father gasped.

Kengo's frail chest is not enough to hold the 20 pounds of a harpy eagle standing on top of it. "Shhh, just go to sleep father. It will be fine."

He watched as Kengo tried to breathe, his chest rattling and his daemon silently screaming until Keiko turned into dust.

It was a pleasure to feel Kengo's hand go lax in his hold.

***

When Ichirou woke up the following morning, he felt like his bones had been broken and resettled. Like he'd been punched for hours, but came out on top. Like it was the first time he could breathe properly.

His hand searched for Mizuki, only to find her curled underneath the blankets.

Understanding came in a flash the first time he touched Mizuki's soft fur.

She had finally settled.

Ichirou threw his covers aside, picking up Mizuki by her armpits and lifting her up to stare at her pale blue eyes. "Really Mizuki? You wanted to be this?" Ichirou asked as her mouth contorted in a grin. "White fur? You know you're going to shed all over my suits."

Mizuki laughed.

And laughed.

And laughed.

***

The whole house seemed to know that Mizuki had settled. Humans and daemons looked at her in reverence as she walked up and down the house, following Ichirou with a wild grin.

"My Lord," one of his underlings said, opening the door to his office. "A Stuart Hatford is here to see you."

Ichirou nods, flicking his fingers as his daemon stood in attention. "Send him in."

The man retreated, then walked back with Stuart in tow.

Years took a severe toll on Stuart's face, evident by the crow feet around his eyes and the frowning line on his forehead. His hair and beard had greyed to the point where the dirty blond straws Ichirou saw once were overpowered by the white and silver.

Once the door is locked behind them, Ichirou and Mizuki finally move, her tail swishing in interest as she stands in front of the badger daemon. Stuart's grey eyes went from Ichirou's discreet smile to Mizuki's white fur. "Arctic fox?"

Ichirou licked his lips. "Regular. She just decided that being an albino would aggravate me even further." He said with a smile.

"I'm glad you came to us." Mizuki said, sitting on her haunches by the badger's side and closing her eyes. Ichirou felt the warmth travel from his arm to his chest as something else settled. Stuart seems to have felt that too, his grey, unbelieving eyes looking at his daemon as if she had betrayed him by nesting side by side with Mizuki, her dark fur and black nose a stark contrast with Mizuki's white fur and pink nose.

"I came here to negotiate a ceasefire." Stuart said after a minute observing their daemons comfortably settled on the carpet.

Ichirou nodded, then delicately reached for Stuart's hand. "Come, let's negotiate then"

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from [Kelsey Gustafsson's poem](https://glitterrockstar.tumblr.com/post/129148051164/i-dont-have-a-set-personality-its-like-one)


End file.
